I haven't blogged about the funny friendship I'm making, but I think its safe to say that is what has happened.  I think I gasp have made a friend.  She drops in my house a couple times a week.  She's loud, she's never dressed very nice, she's extremely opinionated...has a bit of a rough mouth, but she's not scared by my kids, actually she loves them.

We were introduced to each other within the first week after we moved here at our local convenience store.  Rob had introduced me to the owner, and the owner one day was laughing with this loud redheaded lady (yes I said redhair) and she (Karen) said "Oh, this is your neighbour she lives down your way meet Teresa."  

And so we met. For whatever reason she loves to chat.  She stops by as she's walking past on the road, or buzzes in in her husbands truck.  They are DIRT poor, but have mutiple horses.   They are always bartering for just one more.  She is the one we got our blind eyed pony from.  She has absolutely fallen in love with Zeria.  And Samuel and Felix are becoming good friends.  (her son the same age as Samuel)   Her other daughter that still lives at home is 12...and quite autistic.  Teresa was amazed today because her daughter and Zeria actually "played" together...like the third time in Gloria's life that she's ever played.

Its kinda fun having someone drop in unexpected.  And she's just not pretentious.  She's not turned off by my dirty nosed kids, and the fact that RAinee once again forgot to put underware on under her dress.  I don't know where this friendship will go, but man its nice to see an adult other then my husband from time to time. 

I guess the amusing thing is...is she isn't who I probably woulda picked out to be a friend.  I was thinking about this last night.  When you walk into a new situation you scan the crowd (or at least I do)  and think "Oh I would get along with so&so".   Rarely does that actually happen.  I remain aware of them, but I instead bond with someone completely other someone slightly nuts, and almost as lonesome as I was.

But the fact she has redhair must be a bonus...cause my best friend from college  Bluetoban does.  And we got to be friends cause she was always dropping by my dorm room, and then I started dropping by hers, and then we *gasped* ended up being roomates for a year.    We survived being roomates, but we've also agreed we'll never do that again.  *snicker*  Although Faith you'd be pleased to know...I've almost learned how to be a neatnick.  (almost)  My bestfriend from elementary school was the same way.  I didn't pick them out as being the "one"  I thought I'd bond with.  But man did I.  I guess it goes to show, observing isn't the way to make friends, being sociable is.   A lesson I imagine I'll be relearning for the rest of my life. 

 

Ya know...I like this.  I just got it in a e-mail from my friend I linked to on a blog from yesterday.  I could sit here and watch this over and over.  And invision two little boys.....

 

Good morning.  I'm still blinking away the sleep, and wishing it *wasn't* grey sky out there again.

Be careful Munchkin Mama or I'm gonna take you up on the offer of sunshine...at least your out of the apartment so we wouldn't completely squish you.

*snicker*

The verse of the day is;

"If any of you lack wisdom let him ask of God who gives generously without finding fault."  James 1:4

Rob and I talked a bit last night, and drew more conclusions.  We have a joint plan of action for the lying, and for the kicking that occured last night.  There will be no further discipline in regards to last night.  But Rob wanted a certain someone to know that he was unhappy with the way Jamari treated me.   It was important to him...as he was brought up to have the utmost respect of his mom.  The only time he *ever* remembers his dad being mad was when he and his brother one time talked rudely to her.  They weren't touched,  they weren't lectured, but the look they were given convinced them it was not a good idea to do it again.

Rob says he'd like to learn that look...but hasn't figured it out.  *giggles*

Actually I have for the girls.  Most of the time I just glare hard at them and that's the end of whatever their doing.    But then in both of our eyes our parents made parenting look easy.  *snicker*  And then we remind ourselves that his parents raised 2, and my parents raised 3 when we were growing up.    I have 6 ages 8 and under.  Its gets more complicated with each child and all of the family dynamics that swirl around.  The good news is last night I never once got angry at jamari.  I just deal with it calmly, and quietly and we even hugged and cuddled at the end of it.

I had a bit of fun last night play with psp, and ended up with this, I was quite happy with it.  Hope you enjoy.

 

 

Each day I parent...

               ~I know a little less

               ~ I cling to God a little bit more

               ~And I wonder if I'll survive until the last one reaches adulthood.

Jamari has continued his lying.   And his getting Samuel in trouble.  He did two very obvious ones in three minutes.  He got in trouble for the first one, walked into the bedroom, pulled a stunt, and lied about that.

Oh man.

I remarkably stayed calm.

He didn't.

I have a bruise on my leg from where he kicked me.  I've NEVER had one of my children kick me.  He did it 3x, or more I started loosing track after awhile.  And amazingly I never lost my temper.  There was a angel watching over me on that one.  Doesn't mean I'm not still shaking however.

And we got it resolved...eventually.  And we snuggled.  And then i called Rob for comfort.  LOL  I'm so glad he works at a job where I can do that 90% of the day.   There's only 3x a day he's "slightly" busy...with the exception of the rare emergency.  The rest of the time he's just there on-call.   And everyone knows me, and is quite comfy saying "Oh he's busy, I'll have him call you back when he isn't."  So, its quite good.  And one dear lady who spoils me rotten, will say "You sound stressed, I'll go do pill line so you can talk, " which btw I *never* let her do ROFL.  But I love her for offering.

Anyhow.

Parenting. 

Pr 26:28 - Show Context

A lying tongue hates those it hurts, and a flattering mouth works ruin.   That would be my son right now.

I went and hit a bunch of parenting sites about lying.  Most of them were secular, and left me cold.  One actually gave me some practical ways to make the lying less of a battle scene.  I will try it.

And yes, I know some of the cardinal rules.  "Don't force your child in a lie."   I.E.  "Jamari did you clean your room?"  When you know jolly well he didn't.  Instead it should be "Jamari you didn't clean your room, go clean it."

This I get, and I avoid if at all possible. 

The thing is he doesn't do those ones he does stupid ones.  One of my favorites was when we were playing with the aerobee.  Samuel was about 75 feet away from me throwing it to me.  Jamari was climbing the playground equipment behind me.  So there was 100 feet between us.  Jamari slipped and hurt himself.  I asked him "What's wrong?"  He said.  "Samuel hit me."

Umm no.   He did that when he was four.  And didn't get in trouble for it--at four kids kind of have issues with reality.  He did get told he was lying.

He's 5 and a half now, and he *can* tell the difference.  He just enjoys seeing Samuel get in trouble.  He's admitted this to me on several occasions.  Nobody who in the house actually did the issue its "Samuel."  In his eyes. 

The irony in this is.  Samuel gets in 500 more times trouble then Jamari EVER does.  I mean EVER.  Jamari really is a good kid.  He doesn't destroy stuff,  He doesn't beat up on people, he doesn't get excessively hyper, he and Kaylin are my two mellow children.

So I'm stepping back trying to figure out how to approach this without compromising my faith, and while still managing to love my son. 

Big key one on one time is always helpful when theres a major issue.  So, guess its time to try to carve some out with him...even more then he already gets.

Second key.  The counsel I read tonight suggested that rather then "battling" the lie out giving a child a chance to make it right...by sending them to their room to think wether they want to stick with their original story.  Not a time-out just a time for repentance.    It would be a heck of alot better then getting kicked by him.

And when he's calm and rational he can say.  "Mommy, I did it, Samuel didn't, I didn't want to get in trouble."  Which means he's aware, but he always picks the lie first. 

I guess I'll keep praying, and try two hundred.

Man, nobody told me parenting was gonna be this hard of work. 

 

Happy Dance.

This  is my best friend from college.  She can tell all kinds of terribly embarassing stories about me.  *snicker*  But its okay...I can tell quite a few about her.

She has four kiddos and lives in Manitoba.  Which means I haven't seen her in real life since Kaylin was 3 months old.   Too far away.  Go say hi, and maybe she'll hang around.

Good morning

Fathers Day was nice and lazy--the first time we've celebrated it here instead of at my parents.  At my parents we always have Rob sneak out and go for a run.  This year he wanted to go for a bike ride.  He hasn't been biking except in the last two weeks in a LONG time.  So the goal was a 17 mile bike ride.  At 12 he decided to join us at the beach and bag the last.  *giggles*    He was okay with it, so I was.

Next time he'll be able to make it the whole way.  No pictures as my batterys needed recharging and I didn't realize it until I headed out.  *growls* 

I had a strong asthma attack last night, and am still coping with the last of it.  I got into some kind of grass/mold while I was mowing that just knocked me flat.    I am so allergic to Clallam Bay.  I think its time to consider getting put on a allergy med, non of the OTC's work, and I'm tired of wheezing, coughing, and headaches.

I think I've decided my next project is to paint the outside of our house.  I'm gonna start investing in paint on paychecks.  I hate the colors they choose to paint modulars--it immediately identifys it as a modular.  So now I'm gonna find colors that look nice and make it un-modulary.  I know it can be done.  My parents modular is ten years older then ours---and nobody can tell it is one now they did such a lovely job of choosing colors.

I found a site to play with colors on the inside of the house, I'm hoping to surf around and find one for the outside of the house--gotta love freebys.  *grin*

I have a friend in Manitoba who is reading my Xanga almost daily.  She was my matron of honor at my wedding, and  I was her maid of honor at hers.  *waves* to her.  I think she should start her own blog...so I can keep in touch with her like she is with me.  *giggles* 

Other then that, just breathing.  Consciously.  I prefer breathing when it just happens, and I don't have to fight for it.....

Good morning

Okay its actually afternoon but I'm just dragging.

The last two days caught up with me.  So I'm reading a Harry Potter fanfic, and staring blankly.  And yeup I got sucked into fanfic this week.  Its mindless and I've found a couple good authors to entertain me.  Its about the extent of my concentration.

Samuel and Jamari have been at their finest.  (read sarcastically)   Actually as we've observed much more closely lately its Jamari.  He couldn't tell the truth if he was paid to do it.  A couple minutes ago something dropped on the floor that Rob had just got done sweeping.  He wasn't mad, just wanted whoever to dropped it to pick it up.  "Who did that."  The older kids all said it was Jamari.  Jamari's immediate response was.  "Un uh, no I didn't."

He did.  There were three witness to the contrary.

And trust me on this...he's not the kid they like to get in trouble--that would be Sam.

So, the policy is tightening even more of *only* giving Samuel consequences for stuff that we've actually seen with our eyes.  If things continue to spiral...the policy will be Jamari will loose the priviledge of being out of the site of our eyes for awhile.  This will cramp both of our styles, but I'd rather nip it in the bud now.

I just broke out a thing of crayola paints I've been hiding in the bedroom and all of the kids are making fathers day cards.  I'm glad I had them hidden for a rainy day--cause man is it raining. 

Rainee created a new word the other day--thingamabobajig.    I think it will become a household word.  Mommy uses thingamabob  Daddy uses thingamajig.  Rainee put them together.  *snicker*  She was a major trooper through all the doctors visits, and rather fun to be with.  Jeremiah was also a great little trooper.  Rob and I are just exhausted today. 

I think I mighta mentioned that before.  *snicker*

 

For the three of you who are dying of curiosity...

Okay I'm in a mood.

Rainee's endoscopy went extremely well, and the results were all in the normal end.  The biopsy results won't be for 2 weeks but the G.I. doctor felt like their would be no suprises.

I think this is a first...

for a test to come out normal.

I'm very greatful.

I'm also exhausted.

Two mornings of getting up before 5--and 8 hours of driving both days, and 2 doctors visits yesterday, and a surgery procedure this morning.

I've earned the right.

My dad was called this night by his sister-in-law and informed his brother has about 3 days left to live.  He's had cancer for awhile, and we've all known it was coming.  He's actually my dad's half-brother, but it doesn't really matter as my dad loves him more then he does his full brother.  LOL.  He told my sil he really didn't want to remember T when he was so sick, but if she needed him to come he would.  She broke down crying and said she did.

So he's headed that way.    He's not a Christian...and the time is so short.  He holds a lot of hatred over my grandma (who was a Christian)  and was a harsh parent in some ways...especially with him.   Its so hard.  Prayers are appreciated. 

Good morning

Headed out in a few minutes to "run away".   I might actually go to Forks as I've been informed we're out of dish washing soap and laundry soap.  *growl*

We dunged out the van this morning, and Rob is running laundry through so we have clean clothes for tomorrow.  My two pairs of jeans are both needing washed.  LOL  I usually wear leggings, but for the "city"  I'd prefer my jeans.

Zeria and I had a struggle over her hair today.  Its been a two week battle in which I kept threatening to sit down and do her hair if she didn't.  I finally followed through on said threat.  We both want her to have long hair, but those tight kinky curls are a MAJOR pain to keep unmatted.  The mats were almost the worst they'd ever been.  I really honestly don't think she can take care of her own hair yet.

One of the biggest issues with it currently is I typically put it up in braids.  She can wear these braids for a minimum of two weeks.  I then take them out brush through her hair and put them back in.  This is standard care for African American hair.  (I know I've researched LOL).   But whenever she ends up at grandma's house somebody decides to play beauty parlor and undoes the braids leaves it hanging down, and it takes me awhile to get it back up.  EVERY TIME.

So we've had a discussion that there will be no more beauty parlor at grandma's house unless its braids.  Mommy just doesn't have the hour plus it takes to redo braids that she just did the day before.  The braids are not something that are a five minute thing.  The nice braids take upwords of three hours to put in.  I've been told for true honest corn-rows it can take 6 hours.   So to have them undone on a whim at grandma's house is a major pain.  So mommy has declared war on beauty parlor at grandma's house.  *sniggers*  Aren't moms mean????

Other then that just hanging around getting ready for the next two days.  Rainee is extremely worried about it.   She found out more then she was supposed to thanks to a big-mouthed older sister.  She had two sets of nightmares last night.  *sigh*  Hopefully it all goes well.  

The Endoscopy is scheduled for 7:15 Friday morning.  She will be put under for that.  I'm assuming it will be at least 2 in the afternoon before she gets out of short-stay.  Hopefully there are no suprises at the endoscopy, but if there are...I'm not gonna be totally shocked.  That's what Rainee's procedures are about...suprises.

Prayers are always appreciated.

Tonia

soooooooo I fixed the white paint on the wall, and dribbled white paint on my brown floor.

You know I think I should leave the paintbrush alone for the rest of the day.

But I wanted to be DONE before I went to Seattle.  *beats head on desk again*