September 7, 2001

• Daddy’s bathing babies today, and then we’re gonna tuck them in and watch tv.  I finally broke down and ordered a Satellite dish.  ZERO tv reception out here.  So hopefully out of 45 channels we can find something to watch. LOL

  I bowed to the porcelain god this morning. (YUCK)  And wished I could a couple other times today.  I’ve eaten very little, and laid very low.  My kids have been VERy patient with mommy today.

  Kaylin bit me nursing this morning.  Which she hasn’t done in quiet awhile.  I started bawling.  I love the hormones that come with pregnancy.

  My brother & sil have all there stuff moved into there house.  But not unpacked.  I can’t help unpack because it means adding my 3 kids to the mix.  So there 2 girls will come over tomorrow and entertain mine.  Your probably thinking I’m nuts, but in many ways this will make my day easier, because they will have something to do.

  Besides they’ve helped us BIG time on our project, so we need to return the favor.

  Subway cooked dinner tonight.  I ate half of a half of a foot-long.  Its about the only food that appeals to me.  But I wasn’t very hungry even at that.

  Oh well I can eat some on it tomorrow too   And at least it STAYS in my stomache.  I love those pepperchini’s and pickles. MMMM MMMM.

  We took Samuel over to my moms and borrowed her hair clipper.  My brother (14) gave Sam a buzz.  He’s now VERY bald.  But it was the only thing to do to remedy the hairdo.

  Kaylin’s hair.  Well we’ll just leave it alone.  You can see it was cut, but it doesn’t look horrid, just kinda like it was layered.  Zeria only managed to wack 2 or 3 pieces off it, because Kaylin screamed bloody murder at it.

  I told Zeria I should cut her braids off today.  (When I was sane)  She was NOT impressed with that.  So I made her apologize to all involved.  And she did, and was “sad”.  So hopefully no more haircutting incidents.

  About the internet problem.  I do NOT know what to do about it.  The individual is LYING.  She is deliberately trying to pick a fight with me.  A couple others have recognized it. 

  So do I just walk away from the 2 sites that I enjoy.  And let her win?  But they help me so much in keeping sane. 

  Do I walk away from the “bigger” site, and stay in the one where I KNOW the owner of the site will NOT let her get away with her garbage. 

  Do I confront her with e-mail once and for all, and tell her why I’m so peeved at her.  But then she’ll have my e-mail addy.  And I’m fairly proud of myself…that she LOST it. LOL

  I was even the subject of talk on a “BAD” site a venting site.  .  And there on my side.  No I don’t go to this site–but somebody sent me the thread.  And now I’m even more ANGRY.  Because people whom I thought were “nice” and trust worthy.  Are posting on the site…and that site is EVIL! IMHO.  I felt like I needed a bath after seeing it. Foul mouths, bad pictures, and just rude.

  So now I’m feeling more vulnerable.  I guess its dumb.  I knew the internet had “bad” people.  I just didn’t expect the ones who said they were good to have a different persona.  KWIM?

  So for at least another day or two or three I will NOT post on any of them.  Though contemplating going back to HTH which is password protected.  So I’m semi safe there. 

  I am safe there.  I’m safe in my house.  What is the worst they can do send vile e-mails?  I can delete those.  I CAN”T live my life in fear!  I WON”T. 

  Still need a break to get my equillibrium back though.

  • 9:11 pm
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