February 11, 2004
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Well crap.
Yup crap.
I feel like it...and crap.
So, yesterday I made a decision that I couldn't handle something anymore.
It had made my online time increasingly unenjoyable. And I didn't know what to do about it. So I stood up for myself...
And it feels like CRAP.
And no Emma this isn't about GH. LOL Thats rather an intriguing conversation...thats making me think HARD.
Ever since I was little I have stood up for the under dog. It is in the deep core of my making. I got a fat lip oh in the third grade defending the boy nobody liked. This has happened frequently in my life. Getting hurt to defend someone else. Catherine my role-playing character comes from me.
And yup sometimes I get in things that are way too much for me, but I still stand there trying to help. But now that I'm a mom of five little ones. And have fragile health, and a child with fragile health I've chickened out of those kind of roles more and more.
But crap. this one snuck up on me. And I tried valiently to do it.
I can't anymore.
I can't.
I'm not strong enough. I can be a quiet friend. I can laugh, I can cry. But I can't counsel.
Does this make me weak? Or realistic.
Comments (6)
"Who's that? mommy, Who's that?" Charlie's question about Rainee when I was trying to catch up on your site. He thinks she is "coot" and he now wants ice cream too. ROFL
(((((Huge Hugs))))) Been there, done that, totally agree with holding back! Jesus is enough!
You are being realistic. Sometimes the best thing we can do for someone is to be a silent supporter.
{{{hug}}}} realistic.
sweetie, you're giving all you have already. Sometimes your'e jsut not ina space to support others. I'd say you'll be in that space in about 15 years!
I think your survival intsinct is kicking in.
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