December 2, 2002

• Good evening,

  
  

  Its been a very crappy day.  

  
  

  And I don't mean just a little bit.   My rat-finky doctor did not fax my prescription in for my paxil.  I stayed off-line basically all day trying to get ahold of them to find out why.  She said she was gonna do it late September...when I went in for my check-up.   My old script was still good...so I just assumed she had.  Well she hadn't.  And so I've been without it since Friday.  

  
  

  So we called the doctors office twice.  Finally DEMANDING to talk to a nurse to find out why they were being so orney.  The call was placed at 2 pm.   The nurse finally returned the call at 7 o'clock tonight.  Of course the pharmacy's already closed.  And she said well...we sent the information to the front desk...and they probably sent it, but it might still be in their in-box.   #$@*#$&@#(*&*@#(

  
  

  Sooooooooo I may still not have it.  And this is a medication you are NOT supposed to go off cold-turkey.  And well I have.  And its not purdy. 

  
  

  My kids have enjoyed today anyhow.  They "helped" me put up Christmas decorations.  And thought that was wonderful.  I put up decorations that I don't care about tons and tons.  So if one gets broken, I won't get ticked.   I should probably say when, not if. 

  
  

  Daddy and the kids went for a hike in the fog/rain this afternoon.  Mommy refused to go that just sounded icky.   

  
  

  Mommy has hid in her room quite a bit today in an attempt to keep her bad attitude away from her kids.  I don't think they know that mommy was having a bad day.  I hid it well from them for the most part.

  
  

  Daddy however...well he got the brunt of my bad mood.  Poor guy.  He is unfailingly patient.  Except for today  

  
  

  We NEED a date night badly.  Tomorrow (phew)  my sister will baby sit.  We just need some down time something fierce.

  
  

  Do you ever get tired of repeating yourself?  I do.  Absolutely everything I said to dh today..I had to say at least twice before he heard me, understood me.  UGH!   Its bad enough when I always repeat myself with the kiddos...couldn't the dh get the wax out of his ears??????

  
  

  Rainee Grace was up all night last night.  I nursed and nursed and nursed and nursed her.  And then Kaylin Joy woke up at 5:45 and got the other side of me.   I'm so ready for that child to wean!

  
  

  Okay, so maybe it wasn't the lack of paxil that was causing me to be grumpy...maybe it was my oh-so-hectic life.  bwahahahaha

  
  

  I love my husband.  He is a true gift from God.  And a wonderful friend.  Why do I find it necessary to lash out at him sometimes?  Meany me.     I gotta find some self-control.

  
  

  So Hope....any recommendations for a new doctor for me?  I am so NOT happy with mine.   This is NOT the first time they've refused/failed to return my calls on a fairly urgent thing like this.  I love the doctor...I HATE her receptionist/nurses.    *sigh*

  
  

  This blog is kinda wandering everywhere huh?  I guess I'm exhausted, and frustrated, and trying to find God in all of this.  Cause I know he's here...he just seems a bit distant today.  Or is it me thats a bit distant? 

  
  

  Father God, enable me to forgive the person in my life that has hurt me so much.  And to establish an adult relationship with them.  Give me the strength to function tomorrow.  And JOY in my family even with little bits of sleep.  I'm needing you bad.  In your sons name,  Amen

  • 11:42 pm
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