Good morning

Its a beautiful blue sky day again today.  And yet my heart is worried.

My parents had a problem at their house yesterday.  And I can't go into the details.  My heart is just sick about all of it.  And I feel so sstrongly that their making a very very very bad decision.  And yet who am I to judge their raising of teenagers...I'm not their yet.

In regards to another issue that is going on in their house with teenagers which I CAN talk about.  I am so sickened by porn.  I think when our kids hit pre-teens we will go off-line.  My brothers have both been tempted to find it on the net.  And the links are everywhere.  My brother was searching a clothing site and found a link to porn. 

My parents NOW   have a cyber-sitter on their computer...but the damage has been done.  

My brothers are now looking for it...and they like it...and they don't know how to get out of the snare.   My parents no longer have sattelite tv that removed some temptation.  But oh my goodness does our society TRY to make them sin.  90% of tv commercials for crying out loud IMO are soft-porn.  Gyrating bodies with bellies and boobs showing as much as they can.  My husband can't watch the @#$@*&( commercials any more.   And if this is the way it is now what the heck is it gonna be like when my sons get older?

I'm normally not a panicky person about society.  But I'm soooooo depressed by this garbage.

Oh and do you know what porn leads into?  Child molestation, raping, etc.  Anything to get a thrill. 

I tend to wonder in my fear encrusted mind can I trust my brothers to be around my girls now?  How sick is that????

And do they know how they are violating their future wives?   It would break my heart to know that my hubby had spent hours looking at other women besides me. 

Here I am over-weight, and not-so-beautiful in the worlds standards...but my husband finds me beautiful...because I am his and he can look-unashamedly at me.  That is an incredible feeling.  Will my brothers be able to say that about their wives after having spent hours looking at other women?????

Okay enough editorialing....if you think of it pray for my parents and their raising of their second family.  You think I'm a drama queen you have NO idea the garbage my parents have been put through in life over the last 3 years...plus the fact that my dad has been unemployed for LARGE amounts of time, so they are trying to raise 6 children on nothing......

Whoever sent aunt flo back to my house can have her back.  I do NOT welcome her presence.  And I do NOT like being sick. 

You would think seeings I'm tandem nursing...and nursing every two hours all night long that I'd get a break.  But oh no. 

sigh, ugh, whine, and pass me 800mg of Ibuprofen and a quite dark place

Okay I think I've redesigned xanga for fall.     I hope you like it...but if you don't don't tell me.    Come and see

Is that better Sarah??  I fixed the MAJOR oopsie on the banner.  LOL

And btw the picture is a water-color that I did a couple years ago.  And no I'm not an artist I was just goofing around and I liked how it turned out. 

Under construction please be patient

Good morning

Zeria is doing school, and mommy is sneaking a minute on the computer.  This is our first OFFICIAL day of school.  We've played around with it this summer, but now mommy gets serious....   Until some other disaster happens.  LOL

Today we did the letter S and some Math.  She's having a lot of trouble with her handwriting.  Upside down, backwards, forwards, sideways and crooked-doo.   So we'll keep working on that. 

Yesterday (drum roll please)  I got to hear a WHOLE sermon.  James stayed in the nursery and Rainee slept ALL the way through church.  I can't tell you the last time I've heard a WHOLE sermon.  I'm still kinda shocked lol  It was so nice.  And it was a good sermon too!

We also had science today.  ummmm all about how ummm a Tow truck works.  Our van died.  And had to be towed to the shop.    So we watched the tow truck load the van up.  And talked about the lights he hooked up etc.  That counts as Science right???

Rob is getting tired and a bit owly.  Its hard on me cause he's so rarely owly I'm not quite sure how to handle it.  And I'm not sure WHY he's owly.   

Father God, let this day go well.  Let us honor you and enjoy each other as a family.  In your sons name, Amen

What I did today...... Please click I think its kinda cool even if it is my first attempt.  The picture btw is about 50 years old.

Good morning

I survived the trip to Seattle.  It was SOOOOO HOT!!!!  And of course I had to come home in weekend traffic and got a two ferry wait in the heat.  BLUCHKY!  But....Rainee was as good as gold

She did soooooooooooo well.  And I'm so greatful.  She stayed happy even though hungry.  And the only time she cried is when they strapped her down for the barrium swallow (which I can't blame her for).   She actually didn't cry strapped down until they strapped her hands.  That she definitely did NOT think was cool.      But the radiologist was very good.  And very quick.  She took the bottle.    Which was another major praise.  I was so worried that they'd have to do something nasty to do it to her.  But she swallowed it down and I was CHEERING!    And while they were doing the study they let me soothe her by having her suck on my finger so it was the least amount of traumatic it could be. 

The result?  Well I was right!   In other words we didn't need the test (shrugging shoulders)  She does NOT have reflux (told them that over and over).  And everything is put together right.  She just has very bad asthma.  And mommy is probably right in that its allergy related.  So I'm gonna break down and give up caffeine.  If it kills me.  hehehehehehe.   And if there's no change.  Then I'm gonna give up milk (which will kill me.)  Not the milk...but the ice cream I'm ADDICTED to it.  ROFL  If it means clearing up Rainee's asthma it would be worth it!

Today I do not have any idea what I'm gonna be doing.  My sister will be working for me today.  I'm very tempted to crawl into bed and sleep again.  I am after all ONLY 4 months post-partum...and life has been EXTREMELY stressful.    We will see.....

At the moment the kids are watching Pebble & the Penguin, and I'm enjoying the peace.  Decisions to be made later.

Father God, let me honor you today.  And do what is needed to keep you first.  Let my kids grow today and learn something new about you.  In your sons name, Amen

'Morning.

Oh thats right its 6:30 in the evening. 

I have done nothing of profit today.  And OH wow has it been nice. 

I left Rainee with my sister who was finally able to babysit again.  And went to the Chinese restaurant for lunch & a quick trip to Goodwill.  Came home nursed the baby, handed her back to my sister and slept for 3 hours.  I knew I was tired, but not that tired.  LOL

It was so good to get a day to relax.

Especially as tomorrow I'm back to Seattle to take Rainee for her barium swallow. 

I'm nervous about it.  For one she's not allowed to eat for 3 hours.  And for 2 I'm not sure how their gonna get it down her as typically she won't take a bottle. 

Breathing, praying and so greatful for the break.

Good morningi

The kids are all down for naps.  And I needed to take some me time.  I'm very disgusted with life at the moment.  For whatever reason the straw that broke the camels back is my digital camera is not working. 

I survived Rainee's hospital visits.  And all the other crap that's gone on.  But now I just want to bawl.  I'm angry.  How stupid can it be for me to be angry over an inanimate object being broken?   But I AM ANGRY OVER IT!

The camera was MY toy.  The thing I enjoyed.  Everything else in this house is "ours"  And gets trashed on a frequent basis.  The couch is falling apart and UGLY.  Princess pulled the upholstery off the recliner chair yesterday so its now ugly.   My 100 year old hard wood floors never look clean.  I can live with that.

But the camera that was mine.  And I'm ticked I can't get it working.

Am I not allowed to have ONE thing that I enjoy playing with?  Is that too much to ask for?

My birthday is in September.  I was going to get a bike.  Not necessarily because I truely desperately want a bike.  But because my husband loves to ride and I wanted to have fun with him riding.  I wanted to do something that he loves.  And he was eagerly looking forward to doing it with me.    BUT, now am I gonna have to ask for another #$@*&(*&*@( camera? 

Called Kodak about it....they said it was because I'm using the wrong batterys.  So gonna go get the right ones.  I so hope their right, but I HIGHLY doubt it.  I've used these batterys before and they worked just fine. 

Why the heck am I so upset about a camera?

Yeah   My homeschool stuff has a home and is organized.  Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!   Now I just have to start schooling them. 

We have had such a nice relaxing day today.  We woke up and decided to go out to breakfast at Chestnut Cottage.  It tasted sooooo mmmmmmmmmmm   And our kids were angelic.  Which was very very nice.  

We then proceeded to Walmart got the oil changed (over-due)  and picked up some odds and ends.  Mainly shoes for the girls who aren't gonna be able to wear their sandals for more then a week or two before it starts raining.  And some wire shelf stacker thingy-ma-bobs to store homeschool stuff on.  The kids were again  98% well-behaved.  The 2% being Samuel...we do not know how to get him to be calm in the store.  He's a looky-lou.  And forgets that he's supposed to stay with us.  So today we thought we'd try a new approach and not nag him about coming.  We were hoping to "loose" him in that we would know where he was...but he wouldn't know where we were in an attempt to scare him into staying with us.  UGH!  didn't work.  He thought that meant the freedom to run round & round aisles.  Fortunately nobody was in the store or that could have been disastress.  SOOOOOo how do I keep a 4 year old walking quietly beside me.  I'd love to just stick him in the cart, but theirs no room.    And i've also tried making him hold the side of the cart, but then he keeps pulling the cart the direction he wants to go which is VERY annoying.  Suggestions??????

If it stays nice this evening I was contemplating asking Rob if we could sleep outside on the trampoline with the kids.  But now the clouds are rolling in...so we'll see closer to the time.

Father God, thank you for letting me get stuff done today.  Thank you for your love.  Enable us to honor you today.  In your sons name, Amen